The predecessor to Heavy Rain (which itself had that whole 'why render pubic hair if you never get to see it' fiasco) has a difference between the German version and the US version. That's no surprise - if any game gets censored, it gets censored in Germany. However, it's not the way you'd expect. It's the US version that had content censored to appease the ratings board - in this case the ESRB.
Ladies - how many of you wear a swimsuit in the shower? Apparently it's perfectly normal behavior, if Carla's shower scene is anything to go by. A small, barely-there swimsuit, granted, but a swimsuit nonetheless.
Above: Carla's place. Not the best place to stay if you're big on personal hygiene
That's not the only instance of censorship in the US version. It's curtains for the old sexy sex too, quite literally:
Above: "Oh, Carla... I think I... I think I might actually love these curtains" "Naff off"
Ironically for an article about censorship, there are some images from the game we'd better not show you (brilliant, huh?) because they feature full-frontal nudity and more. But we definitely can show you the US version of those scenes. Ready? Here goes:
Above: Not even a swimsuit could save this scene
Remember that scene in Baywatch where the Hoff delivered the baby without the mother even taking off her swimsuit? Confused the hell out of me as a kid, I can tell you. I'm guessing a swimsuit here would have been just as confusing. Let's move swiftly on, it's getting weird in here.
Prince of Persia: The Two Thrones
Censored in: Europe
The PAL version of the third 'new' Prince of Persia game undid all the gory work of the Warrior Within. Gone were the decapitations, the generous splashings of blood and the neat bisections of enemies. You want your foes to be divisible by two? Either face up against a group totaling an even number (that's terrible, sorry) or buy the US version of the game. Yup, there's the rub.
Above: No, honest, it won't come off mate - look. What's that? You're NTSC? Oops...
Parappa The Rapper 2
Censored in: The US
Punch, it's all in the mind / if you ask the censors then / I'll think
you'll find... that any kind of alcohol references will push your game
up to a Teen rating. Oh. So snip went Beard Burger Master's line,
"tastes better than wine", replaced with "so you better get in line." Are wine gums called line gums in the States?
that wasn't the only line altered to avoid that world-ending rating of T
for Teen. The shockingly double entendre-laden line 'Warm your buns'
was replaced with 'toast your buns', just to be sure there was no
misunderstanding that everyone's rapping about bread products and not
somebody's bottom. Even though he immediately goes on to say 'Mmm, my
buns are very toasty'. Facepalm.
just in case anyone got offended at the mere suggestion that religion
actually exists, Guru Ant's references to 'being the Lord' were changed
to 'being the man'. There is a phrase used over here to describe
unlikely events that goes 'only in America'. In this case, it's actually
true. The Japanese and UK versions of the game went on sale unedited.
And nobody took offense.
No More Heroes
Censored in: Japan and Europe
Perhaps the most widely-known case of censorship in this list, No More Heroes was widely censored... but not in the US. The North American version features decapitations, buckets of blood and even bisection of foes. You can see the rather marked differences here:
But neither version featured the 'normal' speed version of the plot explanation, which was deemed so extreme, it was sped up to chipmunk speed so that nobody could understand it. Of course, we slowed it back down again. It really is all about the age rating.
We hear that Suda 51's forthcoming cheerleader killing spree Lollipop Chainsaw is having some content removed in Japan, at least in the regular version. Don't get too happy with that knife over our version, Suda...
Censored in: The US
The Witcher is an openly M-rated game, which means it doesn't have to fan- faff about with pandering to the censors too much. Or so you'd think. Even though the game is still pretty raunchy and you can claim a trophy 'sex card' from every lady you have intimate relations with in the game, said cards were not free from the censor's eye.
The US version covers up the pictures a tad. Well, often more than a tad. Look:
Above: Come on, that's only my second internet cat joke in six years
That said, the uncensored versions I found while researching this article are probably going to get me in trouble with my IT department any minute n
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