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The 6 most humiliating Avatar costumes on Xbox Live [PICS]

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Xbox 360's Avatar Marketplace is the definition of hit-and-miss. For every lightsaber or guitar, there's a poodle purse or goldfish bowl. For every BioShock doll, there's a Minnie Mouse doll. For every remote control Warthog, there's a remote control Tails Tornado. Yes, that Tails.

To find the most embarrassing and excruciating clothing options, however, you have to dig deep… both into your wallet and your dignity. Luckily, that's my job, so you can ridicule the results without any of the risks.

Here are the six stupidest outfits available on Xbox Live. If I ever catch you wearing any of this stuff online, you're right off my friends list.

The Sonic & Sega All-Star Racer

Once upon a 16-bit time, you could showcase your Sega love without feeling an ounce of shame. Now… well, now you'll just look like a rejected fast food mascot with a pet monkey-gerbil. And I will pity you.

Billy Hatcher Helmet = $1.00 (80 MS)
AiAi Monkey Ball = $3.00 (240 MS)
Racing Suit = $2.00 (160 MS)

Total cost of humiliation? $6.00


The Disney Tourist

You might get away with wearing one of these theme park souvenirs for an innocent touch of childhood nostalgia. Maybe two if you're being ironic. Go for the full Floridian, however – or even think about donning that denim jacket – and you might as well be playing Farmville on a motorized scooter.

Goofy Hat = $3.00 (240 MS)
Tinker Bell Tote = $2.00 (160 MS)
Mickey Mouse Varsity Jacket = $2.00 (160 MS)

Total cost of humiliation? $7.00


The Fun Dad

Do you sometimes wish your parents appreciated gaming as much as you? Don't.

"Soda" Hat = $2.00 (160 MS)
"Pwned" Tee = $1.00 (80 MS)
Grill = $2.00 (160 MS)

Total cost of humiliation? $5.00


The International Stereotype

How many cartoonish generalizations can you count? Too bad I couldn't fit in the German lederhosen, Japanese kimono, Hawaiian grass skirt and Chinese firecrackers as well...

Scottish Kilt = $2.00 (160 MS)
Mexican Sombrero = $1.00 (80 MS)
American Torch = $3.00 (240 MS)
French (Italian?) Striped Shirt = $2.00 (160 MS)

Total cost of humiliation? $8.00


The "Mock Me, I'm Irish"

This is funny on March 17th, but on March 18th you just look like a douche.

Leprechaun Hat = $2.00 (160 MS)
Leprechaun Outfit = $3.00 (240 MS)
Mug Glasses = $1.00 (80 MS)
Pot of (o'?) Gold = $2.00 (160 MS)

Total cost of humiliation? $8.00


The Way Too Excited For Alan Wake

Good thing they made this merchandise available a full two months before release… Wake Fever is catching coast to coast and Alaniacs are frothing with anticipation. Now when will we finally get the McDonalds toys and cereal box covers?

Alan Wake Dressup = $4.00 (320 MS)
Alan Wake Logo Hat = $1.00 (80 MS)
Alan Wake Book = $2.00 (160 MS)

Total cost of humiliation? $7.00

And the most humiliating number of all?
TOTAL COST OF ARTICLE = $41.00

Mar 26, 2010


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21 comments

  • Anonymous93 - March 29, 2010 4:47 p.m.

    PHT9P-KXR4Y-BB6BY-VFMPD-THT4T Thats a code for a free Bing top for men. There's a code for women too but I dont know it.
  • Anonymous93 - March 29, 2010 11:41 a.m.

    Ive only got the free stuff like the chocobo, grill (after downloading the free trials for house party), the present prop from christmas and the halo waypoint awards.
  • crumbdunky - March 29, 2010 2:18 a.m.

    I despise the fact I ever had to make my avatar. I hated the NXE because of the gimpy buggers and would go back to the old "blades" in a flash ,. personally! I doubt I've even been to the Avatar marketplace even whilst very messy, drunk or high on Nazi crank injected directly into my penis and ankle.
  • Silentcapt2 - March 29, 2010 1:51 a.m.

    It's not possible to be too excited for Alan Wake =D However, I have to agree with #1. Avatar items are a waste of points imo.
  • soccerclownking - March 28, 2010 12:49 p.m.

    no cyberninja, if anyone actually buys this stuff, they deserve the humiliation.
  • Cyberninja - March 27, 2010 2:23 p.m.

    sucks for the people who buys that stuff
  • philipshaw - March 27, 2010 10:32 a.m.

    And I thought PSN was bad with the cost for a picture beside your username
  • WrathLord03 - March 27, 2010 8:12 a.m.

    They really need to make a t-shirt that says 'I paid $2.00 and all I got was this lousy t-shirt' - it might make people who buy this stuff (except for you, of course, charlie) realise what their doing.
  • michaelmcc827 - March 27, 2010 7:17 a.m.

    Didn't you have to buy the party games too? Man, don't let these bitches at the 'dar push you around like this.
  • TheCreamFilling - March 27, 2010 1:53 a.m.

    Don't forget about those stupid pom poms.
  • Kapwan - March 26, 2010 11:41 p.m.

    I would like to meet the person buying Avatar stuff. Me nor any of my friends have any items other than the Free Halo Waypoint Monitor. Curious if any many has really been made from this junk.
  • Spybreak8 - March 26, 2010 10:36 p.m.

    The only thing I wanted to buy was my N7 shirt, hell yah I think Mass Effect is awesome. Oh you missed one by the way, this was given out for free haha. http://i102.photobucket.com/albums/m114/T_Rogers/300.png Part of a promo they did for Metro 2033, fugly bird mask lol
  • CountZero - March 26, 2010 9:56 p.m.

    Wow, Disney Tourist screams "pedophile"
  • WhiskeyBit - March 26, 2010 7:43 p.m.

    I don't even buy any avatar stuff from the market place... I just use the free stuff it gives you as default. Also, I think the most humiliating is either the halo-themed wears or the MW2 "ghost" costume.
  • Embolado - March 26, 2010 5:55 p.m.

    @tacobob and whats wrong w/black socks?
  • J0NO99 - March 26, 2010 5:49 p.m.

    Awwwww, but the Super Monkey Ball hamster wheel thing looks cute... although its not going to knock off my L4Deeeeeeeeznuts 2 (lol) Medikit
  • Tacobob - March 26, 2010 5:25 p.m.

    The "Disney Tourist" is missing a pair of black socks! And six screaming children at his side.
  • ventanger - March 26, 2010 5:22 p.m.

    Just the thought of somebody buying a t-shirt that says PWNED on it instead of buying "I MAED A GAME WITH Z0MBIES IN IT!!1" makes me sad.
  • PCG_Evan - March 26, 2010 5:22 p.m.

    Great stuff, the Alan Wake guy is ridiculous. I'd love to see a "canonically incorrect" one, something The Simpsons' Comic Book Guy would cringe about: a Halo-helmeted avatar holding a lightsaber next to a Star Trek/Mass Effect accessory, or something.
  • lovinmyps3 - March 26, 2010 5:10 p.m.

    @allthegoodnameswheretaken: Haha true.

Showing 1-20 of 21 comments

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