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The 20 laziest Pokemon designs ever

Features
By Jake Magee published 2 October 2013

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Cofagrigus

Cofagrigus is a perfect example of an evolved Pokmon that has a far superior basic form. This guy evolves from Yamask, a unique and creepy Pokmon that is the spirit of a human. Each one carries a mask with it that was its face when it was alive, and sometimes it looks at it and cries. That's dark and, frankly, pretty cool. So what does this devious thing evolve into when it reaches the appropriate level? A floating sarcophagus, complete with multiple spaghetti ghost arms. There was so much potential here, but, nope, it's gone.

Probopass

Probopass: the Nigel Thornberry Pokmon. The Easter Island statue lookalike that is Nosepass (and seriously, what kind of name is Nosepass?) was only made weirder when it was given an evolution. The unusual design of this thing could have been forgiven if that goofy mustache hadn't been tacked on. Look at that fuzzy mess. Does Probopass not have the self-respect to take care of that gnarly tuft of hair? Or maybe it simply can't reach it due to its useless arms that, for whatever reason, look like mini versions of itself, complete with honkers that take up two-thirds of their faces. Disgraceful.

Fearow

So what exactly about Fearow is supposed to strike fear in our hearts again? Is it the giant red comb sitting atop its head? Or maybe its thin, brittle neck that would probably snap in a strong breeze is supposed to make us wet our pants? And don't forget its beak, the top half twice as long as the bottom; surely that is going to make foes everywhere think twice about attacking this malnourished, plain-colored Pokmon. We think the most frightening thing about Fearow is that its Pokdex number falls only a few places behind Pidgeot, a bird featuring a vastly superior design. Fearow looks like the kind of Pokmon an angsty, gothy 15-year-old would draw on his binder while skipping class.

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Cacturne

We understand it's supposed to represent a cactus, but its humanoid shape and evil eyes make us think of Scarecrow from Batman more than anything else. Honestly, Cacturne looks more like a person in a foamy, green suit, like a man is trying to cosplay as an actual cactus. As a matter of fact, it almost looks huggable, which is a pretty big red flag considering this is a Pokmon based on a spiky plant. Cacturne design isn't particularly scary, cool, or even sensible. It's just silly, and that makes us sad.

Druddigon

Of all of Pokmons many Dragon types, Druddigon has to be among the most creative, mainly due to the fact that it looks like it was hastily drawn in crayon by a toddler that was trying to win a spikiest monster contest. With a face that looks like it's made of chewing gum and sharp, heavy wings (look at those things! How does Druddigon fly with what appears to be broken shards of glass?), we're really not sure what the designer of this "menacing" Pokmon was going for. Add to this monstrosity the fact that its chest reminds us of an accordion and you know you've got a disaster on your hands.

Exeggutor

The series already had a group of plain, pink eggs that somehow function as a single Pokmon--eggcellently dubbed Exeggcute--so what could the thing evolve into? Apparently the answer was a walking palm tree with several coconut faces brilliantly named Exeggutor. Wheres the logic in that? Were not experts, but we dont think tropical trees and eggs have much in common, so we dont get the connection here. With its chubby body and multiple goofy faces, Exeggutor is even harder to take serious than Exeggcute. Hardly 100 Pokmon in and already some outlandish inspirations for Pokmon designs were making an appearance.

Vanillish

We admit that after five generations of Pokmon, fresh and creative inspirations can become sparse. But with the nearly limitless possibilities out there, why would GameFreak choose ice cream as a good basis for a Pokmon design? We can admit Vanillite, the basic form of Vanillish, is cute, even though we're not a fan of it looking more like a delicious dairy treat than a monster trained to fight in a quest for glorious victory. But Vanillite is basically the same thing, only bigger and with a painfully dumb face. Look into its eyes; you can almost see how much this thing loathes itself, with its sickly grin and stubby icicle arms.

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Quagsire

Okay, hold the Xtransceiver. Quagsire is the water fish Pokmon? We're all for unique designs, but if thisthing looks like anything, a "water fish" is certainly not it. Quagsire has more of the amusing appearance of a sock puppet--complete with those lifeless, button-like eyes--than it does of an aquatic creature. Its distant gaze and permanent smile makes us think its IQ is lower than its number of appendages. And its tail. That thing is literally a purple hot dog wrapped in a blue bun. We have the feeling that Quagsire would fit in better on a Saturday morning cartoon than as a competitor in the violent world of Pokmon. It should probably get out before it hurts itself.

Dugtrio

This guy (guys?) represents the epitome of lazy Pokmon design. Everyones first thought upon seeing Diglett as a child was probably something like, "That looks like poop." And that's correct. It's a brown, oblong shape protruding from the earth with hardly any other discernible characteristics. Take a look at its nose. Could it be anymore cartoony or useless-looking? It almost looks like an open mouth complete with a lone tooth at the top. But it gets worse, people. No one knows what Diglett looks like underneath the ground. Even battling with this thing in the middle of the ocean still results in the appearance of the trademark ground around it, which doesn't even make any sense. Adding insult to injury is the fact that Diglett's evolution is simply the same Pokmon multiplied, which is why Dugtrio has made our list.

Garbodor

Okay, this Pokmon is garbage. Literally. By the fifth generation, fresh design concepts were apparently in such short supply that someone thought it'd be a good idea to make a Pokmon based off a fermenting trash bag filled with poisonous rubbish. How does such a thing exist within the world of Pokmon anyway? People continually throw away their garbage until they one day wake up and realize their trash is sentient and bumbling away down the road? Apparently a chemical reaction caused peoples garbage to come to life at some point, but lets be honest; thats a terrible origin for a Pokmon.

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I'm the Editor-in-Chief of IndieGameInsider. I also write about games for money and stuff. Follow me on Twitter @JakeMMagee to get involved in my crazy antics!
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