Moonraker (1979)
The Prosthetic: Jaws’ teeth
The Awesome: Jaws’ metal gnashers not only look the part, but can seemingly bite through pretty much anything. Need some steel eating? Jaws is your man. Roger Moore’s leathery hide wouldn’t stand a chance if he wasn’t so good at finding a handy electrical current at the critical moment.
How We’d Use It In Everyday Life: We’d be straight off to the dentists for some long-awaited payback. Try putting a filling in these, Bub!
Roxanne (1987)
The Prosthetic: CD Bale’s nose
The Awesome: Nicole Kidman’s effort in The Hours was commendable, but when it comes to celluloid hooters, Steve Martin surely takes the cake. Any film that hampers its lead character with such a ridiculous appendage deserves a pat on the back, with bonus marks awarded for having a bird land on it halfway through. Never has a nose provided so many belly laughs, and for that we are truly grateful.
How We’d Use It In Everyday Life: There’d be no more faffing around with cloakrooms if you had a conk like that. Simply hang your coat from the end of it and you’re away.
Live And Let Die (1973)
The Prosthetic: Tee Hee’s hand
The Awesome: Any henchman worth his salt should have at least one metal body-part, and Tee Hee’s pincer is the perfect example. Although his story of how he lost the original to an alligator smacks of pub-bore bullshit, there’s no arguing that his pinchy substitute packs a punch, even if it does look like something that was cobbled together on Scrapheap Challenge .
How We’d Use It In Everyday Life: It looks as though it might be quite handy for opening a bottle of beer. Not a bad little party trick…
X-Men (2000)
The Prosthetic: Wolverine’s Claws
The Awesome: We’re probably stretching the definition of “prosthetic” a little here, but we just couldn’t leave out Wolvie’s adamantium showstoppers. They’re practically indestructible, easy to store (you know, if you don’t mind ten-inch knives popping in and out of your wrists) and look bloody brilliant. If we had to choose anything from the list, we’d go for these every time.
How We’d Use It In Everyday Life: General posing mainly, although apparently they can start a car’s ignition, which could come in handy.
Treasure Planet (2002)
The Prosthetic: John Silver’s arm
The Awesome: Where to start? Not only does old Silver’s arm act as a handy carry-case for a range of kit (including his cutlass, gun and a range of cooking implements), he can also turn it into a massive cannon with the spare parts hidden in his prosthetic leg. Not only deadly, but practical too!
How We’d Use It In Everyday Life: What woman wouldn’t be impressed by someone pulling a wok and spatula out of their arm to whip up a quick stir-fry? That’s right, no woman.
Even Cowgirls Get The Blues (1993)
The Prosthetic: Uma Thurman’s thumbs
The Awesome: What use is a giant thumb you might ask? Well, plenty of use actually, if you’re going to become a hitchhiker. But “being a hitchhiker” doesn’t mean anything? It’s just a relatively unsafe method of getting from A to B? Yeah well you may well say that, but…the point is…yeah okay, they’re useless. Still some neat make-up work though…
How We’d Use It In Everyday Life: Er, we’d take them to sporting occasions and outshine those naff foam hands. Yeah, that’s all we’ve got…
Planet Terror (2007)
The Prosthetic: Cherry’s Leg
The Awesome: When it comes to prosthetic weaponry, you’d think that the leg-region would be the least convenient place to have it. And you’d probably be right, but Cherry makes a very decent fist of things, firing off round after round of machine-gun fire whilst swivelling round on her bottom. What an innovator!
How We’d Use It In Everyday Life: It looks a bit tricky to walk on, so we’d get a wheelchair and fire it at anyone failing to provide a ramp. “Disabled access for all!” we’d cry, heroically…
How To Train Your Dragon (2010)
The Prosthetic: Gobber’s Arm
The Awesome: Now, this is the way to do it. Why settle for one prosthetic, when you can choose from a range of screw-in attachments. Gobber has a hammer for the DIY, an axe for his enemies and a tankard for his ale. Throw in a tin-opener and a corkscrew and we’d happily trade in our boring old flesh and bone tomorrow!
How We’d Use It In Everyday Life: We’d swagger into our local and demand our drinks be poured direct from the tap to our fist, before basking in the admiration of our fellow boozers. Maybe they'd make a film based on our antics... How To Drain Your Flagon anyone? No?
Star Trek (1979-1994)
The Prosthetic: Spock’s Ears
The Awesome: A masterclass in minimalism, Spock’s pointy ears clearly mark him out as an alien being, without descending into the realms of the absurd. Combining with his rigid fringe, the angular, pointy ears help create a sense of perfect symmetry in Leonard Nimoy’s face that fits in nicely with his character’s purely logical mindset. An excellent example of less is more.
How We’d Use It In Everyday Life: We’d use them to affect a snooty demeanour amongst our friends and family. They just scream “higher intelligence”…
The Lord Of The Rings (2001-2003)
The Prosthetic: The Hobbits’ feet
The Awesome: On the face of it, there’s not a huge amount to distinguish the Hobbits from humans, diminutive height and cavernous appetites notwithstanding. However, their stubby, hairy feet subtly mark them out as mythical creatures, simultaneously giving them a shaggy, animal quality that you just can’t help warming too.
How We’d Use It In Everyday Life: They look pretty robust, so we’d probably follow Frodo’s lead and take up hiking. We’d save a fortune on Gore-Tex…
There's a new Mummy movie on the way from the director of Evil Dead Rise and I just want to know if Blumhouse has called Brendan Fraser yet
Marvel Rivals made Jeff the Land Shark so stinkin' adorable that the MCU is bringing him on as an official hero: "We're all Jeff fans around here. Man is he fun to play"
