29 bloody scary things that have chased us in games
RUN AWAY! RUN AWAY!
21. Uroboros
Chasing the crap out of you in: Resident Evil 5 (Multi)
Chasing method of choice: Schlumping around behind you in chase a attempt so single-minded it fails to notice that it’s chased you into a furnace. And is highly flammable. Stupid Uroboros.
Scare rating:
22. Those diamond things
Chasing the crap out of you in: Geometry Wars 2 (Xbox 360)
Chasing method of choice: Ineffectually drifting after you in increasingly large groups in Pacifism mode, before exploding in huge pretty explosions as a result of getting too close to a detonation gate.
Scare rating:
23. That big ambiguous feral black thing
Chasing the crap out of you in: Another World (Multi)
Chasing method of choice: Pretending to be an atmospheric backround animation, before deciding to get involved in the game proper and chasing you right back to before the start of the game.
Scare rating:
24. A Killer Whale
Chasing the crap out of you in: Sonic Adventure (Multi)
Chasing method of choice: Trying to swim through wood for an extended period of time.
Scare rating:
25. Crappy pixellated Michael Myers
Chasing the crap out of you in: Halloween (Atari 2600)
Chasing method of choice: Turning up every few screens accompanied by a pocket calculator version of the first two-and-a-half seconds of the Halloween theme. Performing possibly gaming’s first decapitation, and using only four pixels to do it.
Scare rating:
26. The Dahaka
Chasing the crap out of you in: Prince of Persia: Warrior Within (Multi)
Chasing method of choice: Running, jumping, smashing through walls, stabbing you up with tentacles. It cannot be bargained with. It cannot be reasoned with. But it is bloody terrified of water.
Scare rating:
27. The Antlion Guardian
Chasing the crap out of you in: Half-Life 2: Episode Two (Multi)
Chasing method of choice: Skittering through cramped but incandescently pretty cave tunnels after you, being really bloody hard to kill, being really bloody too big to fit down some of the escape holes you can use. Because you are The Freeman, and thus better than everything.
Scare rating:
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28. Killer Croc
Chasing the crap out of you in: Batman: Arkham Asylum (Multi)
Chasing method of choice: Popping out of the water to scare the crap out of you at random intervals, smashing up floating platforms underneath your feet, having a particularly low resistance to batarangs and high explosives.
Scare rating:
29. Zombie dogs
Chasing the crap out of you in: Penumbra: Overture (PC)
Chasing method of choice: Stalking around in the shadows until they spot you, before sprinting up and biting you up good. Being far more structurally robust than the average dog. Following you through doors if you try to hide. Even if you make a barricade. Being generally completely f*cking horrible.
Scare rating:
Thanks to the ever-wonderfulMobyGamesfor the Mario, Resident Evil 3, Crash, Indiana Jones, Lion King and ZAMN screens.
May 17, 2011