A ten-step guide to videogame morphine

27 Nov, 2007

For a time of peace on earth, there’s going to be a lot of stress and killing around this Christmas. Just think about this winter’s biggest games. Whether it’s COD4’s visceral gunfire tearing apart wall and limb alike, the bloody back-stabbing business of the always-hounded Altair, or Kane and Lynch just being plain old sociopathic, the jovial festival of light and wonder really is looking like a quite brutal one this year.

We need a way to combat this, and preferably one which doesn’t use a rocket-propelled grenade to do it. As fun as it is, gaming can be a damn stressful occupation, and it’s only healthy to take time to unwind every so often. Some filthy heathens would misguidedly suggest that we just stop playing for a while but don’t worry, it doesn’t have to come to that.

We’ve rounded up some of the most tranquil and relaxing experiences gaming can provide, to prove that you can get zen in almost any genre (Okay, so there is one rocket launcher in the list) and help you chill out amongst the Christmas bloodshed. So read on, kick back, and mellow out. Depending on which relatives come round, you might need these to survive.

David Houghton
Long-time GR+ writer Dave has been gaming with immense dedication ever since he failed dismally at some '80s arcade racer on a childhood day at the seaside (due to being too small to reach the controls without help). These days he's an enigmatic blend of beard-stroking narrative discussion and hard-hitting Psycho Crushers.
Latest in Action
Death Stranding 2 Collector's Edition
Hideo Kojima reveals Death Stranding 2: On the Beach release date, and the Collector's Edition includes exactly what I predicted it would
Former Xbox boss says GTA: San Andreas and its infamously NSFW Hot Coffee minigame "signified a maturing of the industry" and put games "on par with movies and music"
Death Stranding 2 PS5 screenshot
Death Stranding 2 pre-orders are estimated to go live this month, and will reportedly include a $230 collector's edition that I pray doesn't come with another creepy baby statue
Assassin's Creed Shadows Claws of Awaji expansion Naoe and Yasuke in Awaji forest
Assassin's Creed Shadows roadmap, DLC and future content
Grand Theft Auto 3
A GTA streamer is trying to beat every single 3D entry without dying, and in 33 hours he's made it as far as San Andreas but keeps getting caught in Vice City purgatory
The Last of Us 2
Naughty Dog has done it: it's remastered the PS5 controller with a Last of Us-themed DualSense announcement 24 hours after Neil Druckmann dashed our hopes for The Last of Us 3
Latest in News
Balatro
Balatro creator started "properly playing the game myself about a week before launch" and had "a pretty emotional moment" where he realized it's "actually fun"
Death Stranding 2 Collector's Edition
Hideo Kojima reveals Death Stranding 2: On the Beach release date, and the Collector's Edition includes exactly what I predicted it would
Kingmakers
Kingmakers is a strategy game about taking on medieval armies with a gun, but its devs thought the giant mech was too much
The Witcher 3 lead says "not many games" were trying to match the RPG back in 2015, and that meant "there was a risk" to making it in the first place
The Blood of Dawnwalker
The Witcher 3 dev says his new vampire RPG Blood of Dawnwalker wants to challenge genre conventions, but only if "we're changing them to actually achieve some goal"
Daredevil recap: The Defenders
Marvel fans are discussing which of the Netflix series characters would have survived the Blip