BLOG What Was R2-D2 Really Saying? Part X

As The Empire Strikes Back comes to a close, R2 is still bleeping and Steven Ellis is still translating

STAR WARS: THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK

EXTERIOR: SPACE – CLOUD CITY – DAY

The Millennium Falcon, being followed by the three TIE fighters, races away from Cloud City.

INTERIOR: MILLENNIUM FALCON – SLEEPING QUARTERS

Luke rests on a cot, his injured arm wrapped in a protective cuff. Leia gently wipes his face. The ship lurches again.

LEIA: I’ll be back…
ARTOO: Is she the Terminator now? Will we go find Sarah Connor?

She kisses Luke, then leaves the quarters.

ARTOO: Sister kisser! So? What happened? Did you see your Dad? Did you try the hug? Where’s your arm? Jeez… You look awful.

INTERIOR: MILLENNIUM FALCON – HOLD

Beeping while he works, Artoo is busy connecting some wires to Threepio who now has one leg attached. Chewie enters through the doorway, grunting to himself.

CHEWIE: Raaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!
THREEPIO: Noisy brute. Why don’t we just go into light-speed?
ARTOO: We can’t. It’s switched off.
THREEPIO: We can’t? How would you know the hyperdrive is deactivated?
ARTOO: It’s switched off! The city computer told me… Ha! I told you earlier remember? You said it wasn’t important. I knew it would be. I’m the bestest!
THREEPIO: The city’s central computer told you? Artoo-Detoo, you know better than to trust a strange computer.
ARTOO: I trusted you back on the city and look what happened to my poor probe…
THREEPIO: Pay attention to what you’re doing!
ARTOO: Oh, be quiet golden shorts!

Chewie is in the engine pit. He is trying to loosen something with an enormous wrench. Frustrated, he uses the wrench like a club and hits the panel...

CHEWIE: Arrrgh! Waaah!
ARTOO: He needs a hug. Maybe he’s just pissed because nobody’s translating him… Should I tell him he just needs to switch the hyperdrive on?

INTERIOR: MILLENNIUM FALCON – COCKPIT

Leia and Lando, seated in front of the control panel, are suddenly sprayed by a shower of sparks. Luke enters the cockpit and looks out the window. He is almost unconscious with pain and depression.

INTERIOR: MILLENNIUM FALCON – HOLD

ARTOO: I should help Chewie. I know where the on switch is…

Artoo races to a control panel and starts working on a circuit board. Furious, Threepio stands on one leg, yelling.

THREEPIO: Artoo, come back at once! You haven’t finished with me yet! You don’t know how to fix the hyperdrive. Chewbacca can do it. I’m standing here in pieces, and you’re having delusions of grandeur!
ARTOO: On switch!

Artoo moves a button on a control panel. Suddenly, the control panel lights up.

ARTOO: Ta daaaa! See! On switch! Easily turn off and on-able!

INTERIOR: MILLENNIUM FALCON – COCKPIT

Leia, Luke and Lando are thrown into their seats as the Millennium Falcon unexpectedly shoots into hyperspace.

INTERIOR: MILLENNIUM FALCON – HOLD

The ship tilts up and Artoo topples into the pit on top of Chewie.

THREEPIO: Oh, you did it!
ARTOO: (in the pit) Of course I did it! I’m fantastic! Oh, sorry Chewie… Hey, you’ll never guess who I met. Remember Yoda?
CHEWIE: (in the pit) Arrrr Whhhooooo.
ARTOO: (in the pit) Yeah… The hyperactive teeny green fella…
CHEWIE: (in the pit) Grrrahh?
ARTOO: (in the pit) In a swamp…
CHEWIE: (in the pit) Rahhhh, arrrgh, whhhhharr shnuff shnuff Roooowl!
ARTOO: (in the pit) He did what? Really? And he just stole your escape pod and never brought it back… What a git!
CHEWIE: (in the pit) Raagh!

EXTERIOR: SPACE – REBEL CRUISER

The Millennium Falcon is attached to a huge Rebel cruiser by a docking tube. Rebel fighters move about the giant cruiser.

INTERIOR: MILLENNIUM FALCON – COCKPIT

Lando sits in the pilot’s seat as he talks into the comlink. Chewie busily throws a variety of switches in preparation for takeoff.

LANDO: (into comlink) Luke, we’re ready for takeoff.
LUKE: (over comlink) Good luck, Lando
LANDO: (into comlink) When we find Jabba the Hutt and that bounty hunter, we’ll contact you.

INTERIOR: STAR CRUISER -- MEDICAL CENTRE

Luke speaking into the comlink as a medical droid works on his hand. Leia stands near him while Threepio and Artoo look out the window.

LUKE: (into comlink) I’ll meet you at the rendezvous point on Tatooine.
ARTOO: Seriously! Who is this Lando guy?

INTERIOR: MILLENNIUM FALCON – COCKPIT

LANDO: (into comlink) Princess, we’ll find Han. I promise.

INTERIOR: STAR CRUISER – MEDICAL CENTRE

LUKE: (into comlink) Chewie, I’ll be waiting for your signal.
ARTOO: And we’re all Okay with this guy running off with Han’s ship then are we?
CHEWIE: Raaaaaah! Waaarrroooow.
ARTOO: Not even Chewie’s worried? I mean the guy’s a crook and he gave Han to the bad guys in the first place… But we all just trust him now right?
LUKE: (into comlink) Take care, you two. May the Force be with you.

Luke looks down at his hand. A metal bandage has been wrapped around his wrist. The medical droid makes some adjustments in a tiny electronic unit, then pricks each one of Luke’s fingers.

LUKE: Ow!

Luke wriggles his fingers, makes a fist, and relaxes it. His hand is completely functional.

ARTOO: Whoa! Cool robot hand you got there Luke. Your dad’s got one just like it. Bet you can do that Aliens knife trick now just like Lance Henriksen!

Luke gets up and walks over to Leia. There is a new bond between them, a new understanding. Together they stand at the large window of the medical centre looking out on the Rebel Star Cruiser and a dense, luminous galaxy swirling in space. Luke puts his arm around Leia.

ARTOO: Uh oh, he’s flirting with his sister again…

The droids stand next to Luke and Leia. Threepio moves closer to Artoo putting his arm on him.

ARTOO: Oi! Hand’s off the dome goldie! You owe me a new probe!

The group watches as the Millennium Falcon moves into view, makes a turn, and zooms away into space.

ARTOO: And we’re really still Okay with this Lando guy just buggering off with Chewie and the Falcon then…?

Read all the previous What Was R2-D2 Really Saying? articles

Latest in TV
Walton Goggins in The Righteous Gemstones
The final season of Fallout star's HBO comedy has debuted to a perfect Rotten Tomatoes score
Daredevil: Born Again
Marvel fans think that Daredevil: Born Again episode 3 just referenced Spider-Man's Miles Morales – but a key detail might have already debunked the theory
Charlie Cox as Matt Murdock in Daredevil: Born Again
Daredevil: Born Again fans are reeling at episode 3's "brutal" ending: "It made me gasp in shock"
Daredevil's mask in Daredevil: Born Again
Daredevil: Born Again's end credits just paid a perfect tribute to episode 3's slain character
George R.R. Martin
Game of Thrones author George R.R. Martin has a new update on The Winds of Winter: "I wish it would come faster"
Lois and Peter in Family Guy season 23
After 11 years, Family Guy suddenly brings back a deep-cut character for season 23
Latest in Features
Key art for Assassin's Creed Rogue Remastered showing Shay Patrick Cormac in a black and red outfit that's a cross between Assassin and Templar armor, with his ship The Morrigan behind him
Assassin's Creed Shadows can wait – I spent 40 hours mopping up the map in the one game in the series everyone skipped
Avowed screenshot showing a corpse-like figure's face with glowing purple mushroom/spore growths
I thought I was going evil in Avowed, but one quest changed everything I thought I knew about morality in this RPG
Yakuza 0
10 years on, Yakuza 0 is still one of the strongest entry points to a franchise ever made
The Witcher 3 screenshot of Geralt
Avowed and Kingdom Come: Deliverance 2 tap into the same thing that makes The Witcher 3 so compelling – and it's something I'm always looking for in RPGs
Marvel Rivals Spider-Man
Spider-Man has become every Marvel Rivals player's worst nightmare
The Iron Mask
The 32 greatest swashbuckler movies ever made