“I like beer and oatmeal, but that doesn’t mean they should be combined into a single tasty meal.” – eldee, forum user
Known for its unrivaled gameplay, graphical prowess and its colorful cast of brooding brawlers, Soulcalibur never needed help in proving it was king of the mountain. Never. Fast forward to 2008 and the long-anticipated Soulcalibur IV now features three Star Wars characters - evil Sith badass Darth Vader for PS3, Jedi Muppet lord Yoda for 360 and as of a couple weeks ago, The Force Unleashed’s secret apprentice for both systems.
Above: Did we need this?
Did anyone tell Namco or George Lucas that it might be a little too much? Besides being a painfully forced tie-in (Unleashed ain’t even out yet!), do we even want our beloved characters from a galaxy far, far away to throw down with the likes of Ivy and Voldo? A simple trolling of the interweb hints at a strong ‘maybe’, but for the undecided, we’ve put together reasons why Star Wars might be shanking the kidneys of Soul Calibur.
Lightsabers don’t mean dick
As children, we’re taught that lightsabers can cut through: metal, flesh, starships, anything and everything. In Soul Calibur, their power has been reduced to that of a neon-colored baton. Stripping all menace from the coolest weapon ever created, a laser blade can essentially be blocked or parried with a bow. It’s just hard for us to see Sophita using her shield to deflect Vader’s saber attack, only to follow up with a cheap sword swipe.
Above: Seriously
Imagine Obi-Wan about to cleave Darth Maul’s face in, when Maul blocks the attack with a wooden staff. If the power of Episode One didn’t weaken the Star Wars mythos already, having the star weapon of choice for the entire Lucasverse completely nerfed just diminishes the ever-waning Star Wars franchise and insults the hardware that the real fighters are wielding in SC.
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