The 100 lamest game-industry clichés
Learn the lexicon of laziness that makes all game reviews sound the same
92. No holds barred - Although this phrase has evolved from its wrestling origins to imply unrestrained action without limits, in the context of videogames, it almost always means "you'll punch some dudes in the face a whole bunch."
93. Recipe analogies - Take one part repetitive, add two parts horrible, garnish with boring and serve with a twist of tiresome, and you've got one of the worst clichés ever devised!
Above: This is not a videogame, so stop pretending that it's made the same way
94. The beginning of a beautiful friendship - The closing line from Casablanca, a movie watched by only one percent of the people who quote it.
95. Overall - See All in all
96. Totally unique twist - It was zombies the whole time.
Above: OH NO ZOMBIES!
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97. Blockbuster lineup - A handful of shitty games that were all rushed out the door so as to coincide with each other. May contain 1-3 good games, but only if balanced with 3-5 shovelware "casual" games. In rare cases, every single one of the games will be good, but they'll all be eclipsed by each other and disappear into obscurity (ex. Ubisoft's 2003 holiday lineup).
98. Accessible yet challenging - The game has exactly one action button, but will earn your admiration and secret hatred when it mobs you with hordes of ridiculously tough triangles.
99. Rock the competition - Mildly annoy the competition.
100. "Top XX" list articles - Who writes these? Not us, that's for damn sure. And we sure as hell don't write them every week, and you certainly can't see some of our best ones here.
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Jul 22, 2008