Don Diego De La Vega (The Mask Of Zorro)
The Student: The young bandit who will take up De La Vega’s role as Zorro, Alejandro Murrieta.
Key Lessons: That the spirit of Zorro comes through service to the people, to hide personal pain and suffering with the mask of Zorro and, crucially, how to cut ‘Z’ in everything with a sword.
Wisest Words: Don Diego: “Do you know how to use that thing?” Murrieta: “Yes. The pointy end goes into the other man.” Don Diego: “This is going to take a lot of work.”
Eric Cantona (Looking For Eric)
The Student: Sadsack Manchester postie Eric Bishop.
Key Lessons: That there is no such thing as can’t, and that anything can be achieved with the help of your ‘teammates’.
Wisest Words: “I am not a man. I am Cantona.”
Juan Sanchez Villa-Lobos Ramirez (Highlander)
The Student: French-American-Scots immortal, swordsman and all-round ever-living good egg, Connor MacLeod.
Key Lessons: The worst on-screen Egyptian of all time teaches Connor the rules of the immortal race to which they both belong, and gives him the courage and skill to take part in their age-old competition.
Wisest Words: “You have the manners of a goat, and you smell like a dung-heap. And you have no knowledge whatsoever of your potential.”
Lester Bangs (Almost Famous)
The Student: William Miller, desperate 15 year-old wannabe rock journalist on tour with hair band Stillwater.
Key Lessons: That writers are intrinsically uncool, and that even though writing about a band means getting close to them, telling the unflattering truth is the only way to succeed.
Wisest Words: “I know you think those guys are your friends. You wanna be a true friend to them? Be honest, and unmerciful.”
Gordon Gekko (Wall Street)
The Student: Charlie Sheen’s desperate to make it stockbroker Bud Fox.
Key Lessons: The virtuousness of greed, the primacy of the dollar. Gekko encourages Fox to betray his friends and his family and break all the rules in search of a profit. He’s rejected in the end, but 23 years on nobody’s quoting Charlie Sheen’s lines.
Wisest Words: “I create nothing. I own. We make the rules, pal. The news, war, peace, famine, upheaval, the price per paper clip. We pick that rabbit out of the hat while everybody sits out there wondering how the hell we did it. Now you're not naive enough to think we're living in a democracy, are you, Buddy?”
Mr Han (The Karate Kid)
The Student: In a reversal from the original film, the student is now Jayden Smith’s weedy young American kid who’s picked on mercilessly when he moves to China with his mother.
Key Lessons: Jackie Chan’s Mr Han teaches his pupil much the same lessons ad Pat Morita’s Mr Miyagi taught Daniel back in the ‘80s – to focus, to always remember the true meaning of training (/not/ looking cool or kicking dudes in the face) and that old oriental guys are really funny.
Wisest Words: “Your focus needs more focus.”
Mickey Goldmill (Rocky)
The Student: The lump-headed amateur slugger with a fairytale shot at the big time, Rocky Balboa.
Key Lessons: Mostly fury. The cranky ex-champ chews Rock out for being a bum, tells him to stay down when he’s getting a beating, and works him like a dog. And it works.
Wisest Words: “You're gonna eat lightning and you're gonna crap thunder!”
Jim Malone (The Untouchables)
The Student: Kevin Costner’s ‘Let’s do good’-ing, Al Capone-hunting T-Man, Eliot Ness.
Key Lessons: That catching Capone will require an escalation that will change Ness’ life forever, and require a team of unimpeachably honest cops. And that, no matter if he’s Egyptian or Irish, Connery’s mentors sound identical.
Wisest Words: “You wanna know how to get Capone? They pull a knife, you pull a gun. He sends one of yours to the hospital, you send one of his to the morgue. That 's the Chicago way!”
Yoda (The Empire Strikes Back)
The Student: Luke Skywalker, Death Star destroyer and would-be Jedi.
Key Lessons: All to do with The Force – how relaxing can aid your control of it, and how lifting an X-Wing is just as easy as lifting a bunch of rocks. Even though it really doesn’t look like it.
Wisest Words: “Adventure. Heh. Excitement. Heh. A Jedi craves not these things. You are reckless.”
Morpheus (The Matrix)
The Student: Pasty-faced IT man and soon-to-be digital messiah of all mankind, Thomas ‘Neo’ Anderson.
Key Lessons: That the world we live in is a highly complex computer simulation and by opening your mind, bending spoons and wearing big leather jackets, it’s possible to rewrite the program as you go.
Wisest Words: “What are you waiting for? You're faster than this. Don't think you are, know you are. Come on. Stop trying to hit me and hit me.”
There's a new Mummy movie on the way from the director of Evil Dead Rise and I just want to know if Blumhouse has called Brendan Fraser yet
Marvel Rivals made Jeff the Land Shark so stinkin' adorable that the MCU is bringing him on as an official hero: "We're all Jeff fans around here. Man is he fun to play"
