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It's been a long time since Wayne's World and Dana `Garth' Carvey has clearly shattered his funnybone in the intervening years.
Carvey plays Pistachio Disguisey (Bad Omen No 1: unfunny funny name), an Italian waiter whose parents are kidnapped. Could be a problem, si? Well, no, because Pistachio luckily discovers he's a - wait for it - Master of Disguise, blessed with the ability to impersonate anybody and everybody in order to put right the evils of the world (Bad Omen No 2: lame-arsed plot).
And so this goofy man-child must track down a flatulent baddie (Bad Omen No 3: excessive use of fart jokes) while impersonating, among others, President Bush and, for some reason, a turtle (Bad Omen No 4...).
If Carvey's looking for a comeback, then playing a cloying dimwit with an annoying accent isn't the place to start. There's no disguising it: had this come out a few weeks earlier, it would have found a home on Total Film's 2002 Turkey list.
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