The Wash review

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Perhaps if you were extraordinarily stoned and personally acquainted with a cast member, you might be able to muster a chuckle from this plodding, joyless action-comedy from DJ Pooh (we shit you not). Anyone else should remember that this ludicrously named helmer co-wrote Friday and stay well clear.

Loosely inspired by 1976's Car Wash, this hapless comedy casts Dr Dre and Snoop Dogg as two dopehead chassis-scrubbers, ensures a tie-in soundtrack, and then sits back and hopes its stars' musical reputations will reel in the punters. No need to worry about such trivial matters as characterisation, plotting and jokes.

Rappers drop by for sleepwalking cameos (although Eminem is good value as a demented former employee) and there's an entirely gratuitous bikini car wash scene to keep the breast count up. But this is one of those most grating of movies: clearly a hoot for everyone involved, painful for anyone who has to sit through it. Crap.

The Total Film team are made up of the finest minds in all of film journalism. They are: Editor Jane Crowther, Deputy Editor Matt Maytum, Reviews Ed Matthew Leyland, News Editor Jordan Farley, and Online Editor Emily Murray. Expect exclusive news, reviews, features, and more from the team behind the smarter movie magazine. 

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