Quake Mistake
By Khalin
I drink Bawls all day to stay awake
So I can blast all my enemies away in Quake
After all these drinks I need to pee.
Need to think of something quick before my bladder explodes inside me.
Find an empty bottle and open it up
Let my golden liquid fill the cup.
I feel a sudden rush of ecstasy flow my veins.
I throw the bottle out of window but miss and hear a shatter and feel a slight rain.
But I couldn't be distracted because the match was almost over.
So I played with my own piss on my shoulder.
--
When we started looking for videogame poetry, this was the sort of stuff we hoped for. Puerile? Yes. Disgustingly real? Yes. Funny? Yes!
This all-too-believable poem clearly encapsulates all that makes videogames both a brilliant and a terrifying diversion, while managing to avoid your usual forumite poetry themes of slagging off Sony, berating Sony, calling Sony something unrepeatable, making fun of Sony, or stressing how amazing the Wii/Xbox 360 is in comparison to Sony's console. Poor Sony.
